OMG you guys my Moms is so EMBARRASSING. Like, look at her! All cuddly and smothering with her eyes all closed and I THINK SHE IS INHALING MY EAR SMELLS. Doesn’t she know that I’m an ADULT now! JEEZ LOUISE, MOM!
Like, it’s okay when my one true love Miss Timothy Buttons inhales my ear smells. In fact, I wish she’d do it more often. I inhale Timothy’s ear smells ALL THE TIME but when I ask T-Buttz to inhale my ear smells she’s always like “I’M A BUSY LADY, SIDDHARTHA” and then she goes and chases after her stupid laser pointer or something and when I REMIND her that the laser pointer ain’t gonna tuck her in at night she’s all like “I’M A 21ST CENTURY WOMAN! I CAN TUCK MYSELF IN!” and before I can say anything back she runs into the other room and burrows under a blanket so I just take a deep breath and let her have her space but then, like, fifteen minutes later, after I’ve moved on and started chewin’ on my antler, I suddenly feel her absurdly long tongue floppin’ against the side of my head and and her pretty, pretty muzzle pressed right up against my ear and then I hear her nose take a deep breath…and when she’s done inhaling my ear smells I say, “Timothy Buttons, you complete me.”
“A Timothy Buttons by any other name would smell as sweet.”
I’ve come to the conclusion that Sid has absolutely no faith in our promise to reward him when he does something good. Considering the number of treats this pug gets throughout the day as rewards for doing things as minor as sitting in his bed, I have no idea how and when we lost his trust. Was there some incident in the past when he saved a boy from a well and we totally forgot to give him a treat??? Perhaps he vacuumed up all of his pug fur one weekend and we didn’t even notice, let alone give him a carrot??? Whatever it was, now the pug can’t just patiently wait for his treat when he does something good, as you’ll see in this video of Sid waiting at the bus stop in his travel bag:
OMG YOU GUYZ I WORKED SO HARD ON IT AND IT’S FINALLY DONE!!! I learned how to read music! I learned how to play my Dad’s piano! I learned how to play my tiny piano! I learned how to play my Dad’s melodica! I learned how to play a wood block and a drum and a cymbal! And it was all worth it because you guys ROCK so you deserved a THANK YOU that ROCKS.
So, here is my special thank you video for all of my friends who helped refill my treat fund after my mondo vet bills and for all my friends who read the blog and for everybody who’s ever been nice to me and snuck me a treat when my parents weren’t looking. YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST. THIS ONE’S FOR YOU!
PUG SLOPE chronicles the adventures of a pug named Sid as he navigates his way through the world. He was born and raised in Los Angeles, California, started the blog in Park Slope, Brooklyn, and is currently calling Chicago, Illinois his home.
